i found this list on my coffee table:

shiza on your visor
poo on your doo
scat on your hat
turd on your bird
brown on your crown
slop on your top
crap on your cap
flop on your mop
smellin on your melon
bung on your tongue
flow on your fro
bowel on your scowel
rain on your brain
moca butt on your coconut
cream rocks on your dream box
ass splatter on your gray matter
blob on your nob
boodle on your noodle
dump sin on your pumpkin
stank on your think tank
stinker on your thinker
fig on your wig
missle on your bristle
liquid shit in your mouth
bloody dump up your nostrils

my favorite is the ass splatter one.

i remember his name now. ferrin (farin? ferin? farrin?) something like that. i assume thats a last name.

okay. so there is some news on the job front. however, too many pieces are in play to mention anything in a public forum such as this.

next, i just finished Closer. im not sure how i feel about this film.

this past weekend i went to a 4-wheeling party. thats right. lots of mud, a bbq and a fire. it doesnt get any better. i had some flyers for a coupla fairs around my neck of the woods because frankly, i could barely believe some of the "events" scheduled. for example, the cow flop drop. for those unfamiliar with this, a field is divided into grids and each one is sold, sorta like a raffle. wherever the cow shits, thats who wins. sweet right? it barely gets more rednecky than that. also scheduled are a minivan demolition derby, goat milk-off, a horse pull, tractor pull, and everything else you can imagine pull. i really wish i hadnt lost those flyers, cause there was shit i had never even heard of. awesome.

i hung out with some kids i hadnt seen since pretty much highschool this weekend. pretty unreal. i also went kayaking on grafton pond on sunday. friggin awesome. except im burned. but awesome still. umm, well thats mostly all of it though i had planned on writing it a little less all over the place.

oh yeah, ive been reading Tom Robbins lately. some interesting stuff. id describe it as a little like kurt vonnegut (admittedly ive only read one of his: Breakfast of Champions) but hes more of a perv and has a thing for redhead protagonists. good stuff. thanks to that crazy guy whose name i cant remember for suggesting them. i met him through the hamels: he knew a lot of dead baby jokes, and hung out with jay and matt dunn. thats all i can say.

okay, i guess im done for now.

i got some good shit to write about. not now though. im busy.

i am not a fan of the phone interview. i can see how some people would enjoy the distance so they could be, say, in their underpants while talking to a possible employer, but i REALLY dislike it. talking on the phone is not one of my favorite things to do. actually, i am quite uncomfortable and awkward doing it. the only thing i can think of is: "when can i stop talking into this thing?"

on a semi-related sidenote, the search continues for employment. a recent high note: i was turned down for several 3rd shift janitorial positions at a hospital. evidently im not good enough to clean up shit and buff floors. damn.

did anyone see that scumbag from france headbutt that guy? the whole match they were saying what a classy guy he was. F-that guy.

here is a list of major motion pictures that were created from comic books:
batman
superman
spiderman
x-men
incredible hulk
punisher
fantastic four
dare devil
spawn
catwoman
elektra
hell boy

here are some im not sure about:
sin city?
ultraviolet?
dick tracy?

here are some in progress:
wonderwoman
flash (there was a tv series i think)
thor
silver surfer (i think ...)

did i miss any? who cares.

here's todays edition of things i should know and could find out with a 2 minute internet search:

rear-view mirrors, how does that switch work to dull headlights at night? also, whats the deal with scotland and wales? are they countries?

best quote of the week: "i slept through armageddon yesterday".

quality NPR analysis of the week: "some experts say that this process will revolutionize the industry. critics say that it is a mistake" ... oh is that what the critics say?

here is my take on sex and the city: the story of 3 moderately goodlooking whores and their hot yet conservative friend. hilarious.

on a side note, i think i set my personal best for most punctuation per post.

if anyone read the post i left last night ... sorry. it has been removed.

this goes under the "i wish i thought of it" category:

BERLIN (Reuters) - World Cup pranksters in Berlin injured at least two soccer fans by inviting them to kick soccer balls that they had secretly filled with concrete, authorities said Tuesday.
At least six concrete filled soccer balls were found chained to lampposts, trees and handrails across the city next to the spray-painted message "Can you kick it?," Berlin police said.

"Two young men kicked the balls and suffered bad bruising on their feet," a police spokeswoman said. "We still don't have any leads in the case."

this is also pretty good.

i think i put a link for this up awhile ago. but here it is again. it is awesome:

JD8

also, i recently saw this. i find it funny:

Chokeback Yankees

i just recalled one of the more comical moments of robbies party:

setting: im on the porch talking with a friend when a group of strange people arrive

friend: ummm, who do you know here?
spokesperson of drunken males: yeah, i know this guy robbie ... he works with my friend ben at their, um, job.
friend: i dont think he knows you.
spokesman: yeah he does.
friend: i doubt it.
spokesman: yes he fucking does and when i see him i bet hell kick your ass for giving us shit.
friend: well, im robbie, so fuck off. and guess what? i actually KNOW all the people here who WILL kick your ass.

those poor fools hopped into their shitbox wagon and got the hell out. i have no doubt that they would have lost their lives had they tried to stay. all in all, an interesting crew that night. im not sure the above conversation is entirely correct, but thats how i remember it. good times, good times.

check it out. i updated the links section above ... due to several of the blogs linked no longer written. so you know eric, you are close to getting the hook as well.

No One Wants to Play Sega with Harrison Ford

heres a couple of videos (both safe for work should anyone view my site at work):

funny
scary

the da vinci code has now made more money than the passion of the christ (642 M to 623 M). that doesnt include the book sales which are absurd (over 40 million copies). conclusion: people like robert langdon better than jesus.

after watching 8 world cup games, by far the most entertaining was portugal vs. angola. watching christian ronaldo play is awesome.