lots of exciting things going on. the lowest temperatures in decades being recorded, a second week of co-op completed for many northeasterners (and classes for the rest), patriots playing in the AFC championship game, and probably some other real good stuff. anyway, i rarely have the time to write like i did on my last co-op, so often my good ideas, criticism, and sarcastic remarks remain unshared. not too much i can do about this though, my memory is definitely getting worse, and motivation to find a solution is virtually nonexistent.
i have recently returned to the gym after my nice long break. needless to say, i overworked each and every muscle group so routine activities like sitting up in bed, taking off my jacket, and crushing peoples skulls with my fists are now near impossible. luckily, i should be good as new for this weekend (which begins in approximately 15 minutes).
im going to the bar on saturday night i think should anyone desire to join me.
Wednesday, January 14, 2004
due to my imminent passing (probably, ok, well maybe), i have begun to compile a list of Don'ts to assist anyone wise enough to read this list and heed its warnings:
1. First, here is an important list
Now I will commence with the list of things of learned in my 21 years:
2. Do not fry bacon without a shirt on
3. Do not run naked through prickers
4. Avoid breaking objects over your forehead
5. Don't pour hot gel from those "new age" candles on your hand thinking it wont hurt like wax doesnt
6. Do not dump acetone on your coffee table cause it will take the stain off of it and youll have to put up with countless questions
7. Don't consistently beat up your little brother, especially when he grows to be several inches taller than you
8. Runing with scissors is ok unless you are running and trying to cut something at the same time
9. Do not allow someone to shoot a blowdart at you ... it hurts more than you think
10. Prevent all police altercations at parties by dressing properly ... a warm jacket in winter, running shoes at all times,etc and learn the easiest escape routes
11. Do not be ashamed of begging your teachers for both sex and better grades
12. Don't tell a girl you like her unless you a.) know what she thinks, b.) have another girl to go after if it doesnt work out with this one
13. Don't swim within a half hour after eating, you might get a nasty cramp that can be sort of a mild annoyance.
14. Any diet (atkins) that replaces all worldly staples that have sustained the human race for 5000 years, i.e. potatoes, bread, rice, etc. with bacon, is a stupid and bad idea. it just doesnt make sense folks. plus i love bacon
HOLY SHIT. ON A SIDE NOTE NO WHERE NEAR THIS LIST. I just read 2 consecutive entries from tuesday 19, 2002 in which i said the same exact thing. im awful. also, how bout my last 4 posts ... lots of work went into those. ok, back to the list
15. Don't swear at your boss on your first day
16. Don't tell your boss he is within 5 years of dying
17. Don't make fun of coworkers wives and children
18. Elaborate schemes to avoid doing work are often more work than the original work
i had planned on a larger list, but ... i guess i havent accumulated the wisdom needed for more than 18 items.
1. First, here is an important list
Now I will commence with the list of things of learned in my 21 years:
2. Do not fry bacon without a shirt on
3. Do not run naked through prickers
4. Avoid breaking objects over your forehead
5. Don't pour hot gel from those "new age" candles on your hand thinking it wont hurt like wax doesnt
6. Do not dump acetone on your coffee table cause it will take the stain off of it and youll have to put up with countless questions
7. Don't consistently beat up your little brother, especially when he grows to be several inches taller than you
8. Runing with scissors is ok unless you are running and trying to cut something at the same time
9. Do not allow someone to shoot a blowdart at you ... it hurts more than you think
10. Prevent all police altercations at parties by dressing properly ... a warm jacket in winter, running shoes at all times,etc and learn the easiest escape routes
11. Do not be ashamed of begging your teachers for both sex and better grades
12. Don't tell a girl you like her unless you a.) know what she thinks, b.) have another girl to go after if it doesnt work out with this one
13. Don't swim within a half hour after eating, you might get a nasty cramp that can be sort of a mild annoyance.
14. Any diet (atkins) that replaces all worldly staples that have sustained the human race for 5000 years, i.e. potatoes, bread, rice, etc. with bacon, is a stupid and bad idea. it just doesnt make sense folks. plus i love bacon
HOLY SHIT. ON A SIDE NOTE NO WHERE NEAR THIS LIST. I just read 2 consecutive entries from tuesday 19, 2002 in which i said the same exact thing. im awful. also, how bout my last 4 posts ... lots of work went into those. ok, back to the list
15. Don't swear at your boss on your first day
16. Don't tell your boss he is within 5 years of dying
17. Don't make fun of coworkers wives and children
18. Elaborate schemes to avoid doing work are often more work than the original work
i had planned on a larger list, but ... i guess i havent accumulated the wisdom needed for more than 18 items.