MSDS

me and ben are going to see if we can get people interested in throwing christians to the lions again. first on the list: catholics. followed shortly after by any and all "born-again" christians.

after listening to years of seemingly unending chatter about steroids i have decided to come to the rescue. there are a number of potential laws and policies in place and/or about to be implemented. they wont work. it should be one, and done. get caught once and you are banned from your sport, and all other professional sports. in addition to being banned (for life) from your sport, you should also be penalized in a way that is fitting for your sport. heres some examples:

baseball: must take a fastball to the crotch
basketball: must have a jermaine oneill punch you in the face
golf: must have a golf ball driven into you from a distance of 10 feet

you get the point.

quote of the day:

"the pope dying was pretty much the best thing that ever happened to me"

if any of my coworkers or superiors knew just how little i care about the work im doing, there is no way in hell i would be given the responsibility i have now.

i want to shoot a turd rocket into eddie murphys face for writing (or atleast recording) that travesty: Party All the Time. the song sucks hard. real hard. comedians shouldnt sing. no matter how intensely they try, inevitably it ends up resembling a sack of soggy dicks. this does not apply to songs written for comedic value (Adam Sandler, etc.)

angela muzzey is a liar.

i think i slept on my baseball glove last night, cause i found it in my bed and my back really hurts ... as though i had slept on a baseball glove.

i watched animal face-off last night. basically they pit two beasts against each other in a virtual battle to see who would win. last night, Polar Bear vs. Walrus. the walrus won. i think it was bullshit though.

my lebanese manager cracks me up. his english isnt quite tip-top and i often have to think for a second about what he is talking about. for example:

he says: i dont think so he is here.
he means: hes not here.

he says: i dont think so we can do it.
he means: we cant do it.

and so on.

i have much to speak of, however, the thoughts are all still jumbled in my head so they will likely not be coherently and logically represented.

my sister got a new puppy, Ruger, a chocolate lab. hes adorable. and hell bite your ears off everytime he has the opportunity.

i saw my brothers this weekend. pretty funny.

at prom, i saw the most attractive girl i have EVER seen. hands down, no question, the best girl ever. shes already a model full time, and well out of my league. plus shes 16 or 17.

dooling, i owe you two cheeseburgers. the escalade has a bench seat in the front, and it isnt illegal to write on money. unless you intend to alter it in such a way as to make a profit.

mike and owen, you both owe me a cheeseburger. heres the proof: CHEESEBURGERS. by the way, the bet was that the Giants have been in the superbowl within the last 6 years. and they played just 4 years ago. bitches.

a movie title that inspires my rage from within: "The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants". there is no way that this thing will be good.

i guess my crack at homeschooled kids was a bit harsh. i didnt realize you were homeschooled gordo. you are normal.

my brother mike told me about this russian chick, she has x-ray vision ... its crazy. i did some research into it and i guess she is the real deal. can look inside your body and see your organs, diagnose diseases, all kinds of shit. check it out

Timmy B has a blog now, wanted me to advertise: he said hed blow me if i did.

eventually ill put it up in my links thing, HTML is annoying though, and ima see if i can get another hummer out of it.

ive seen Anchorman twice in the past 3 days, and laughed uncontrollably both times throughout the feature. i had heard from a number of people that it was a poor movie. now i know that you are wrong.

"all the easy shit has already been invented, i need to go back in time and invent some of that crap. i mean, a Thermos? Index cards? please."
-Tristen Lucas

i have recently come to the realization that i hate a guy i work with. he is very protective of his things (none of it is actually his, but rather Rohm and Haas') so i have decided to start acting like a real prick to him. no more false courtesy and emtpy conversations about his weekend. now i wait till he leaves the lab, and i move his equipment all over the building. he will never be able to find what he needs. maybe ill put a tack on his chair or something too. i could always just dump some random chemicals into his experiments. plenty of ways to sabotage at a chemical company.

im only slightly curious about the new star wars because they beefed it up with a PG-13 rating instead of a PG. i guess theres a bunch of murdered kids and other forms of reckless violence.

i guess thats it for now.