i have done it! i have finally accomplished what some said was the impossible. i have slept with all three of my roomates mothers. i had been bragging about doing this for some time, and now i can honestly say that i have done it. mrs hamel was the last of the three but even she was helpless against my charm and devilish good looks. she has now been added to the list of them chicks that i done been in.

for those who went to my highschool, do you remember that crazy man bob holmes ("the one man volleyball team"). he was basically ridiculous. check out this thank you letter i found on the internet: click on me. oh rural new hampshire SADD chapter. you are certainly living up to your name.

did anyone watch the daily show last night? it doesnt really matter if you did or not. admittedly, it is a comedy show, meant to poke fun at the government and everybody else, but it is at least partly based on the truth. this post is based loosely on the daily shows report on the war. i dont really know much about this ultimatum we have given saddam, but from what i understand, we have demanded he destroys all his weapons of mass destruction, which we cant actually prove he has. not too mention he clearly isnt admitting to having them. as i see it we have 2 basic scenarios that could possibly play out, both of which lead to war. scenario 1: if he says, "ok, i have them, here they are, im gonna destroy them", then that is grounds for war because he admitted that he's been lying about it the whole time. think about it. if we were going to invade just for the suspicion of him having weapons, what do you think would happen if he said "yup, i am a big liar. here they are". scenario 2: he never admits to having these weapons we think he has, and we go to war on monday. now, does this sound familiar to anyone. it sort of reminds me of the salem witch thing. for those not familiar, suspected witches were thrown into the river. if you could swim and got out then you were guilty of witchcraft and doomed to be burned at the stake. however, if you could not swim, you were happily innocent of the charge of witchcraft, but since you cant swim you would be dead anyway. sort of a damned if you do, damned if you dont situation. so ... we will go to war.

as i take a break from the studying that i so desperately need more before my 2 evil finals today in calculus 4 and organic chemistry, i would like to tell the jerks with the jack hammer outside need to cut the shit. honestly, all morning all i hear is the horrible "whacking" noise of the jack hammer. though he probably doesnt know that it is finals week here at northeastern, perhaps someone should tell him. if i felt confident enough with my accuracy i would be procure some sort of object to destroy that man. we cant have our music above 2 decibals without people bashing the wall and yet this crazy asshole is permitted to jackhammer through endless amounts of concrete the entire morning. by the way, since the world is probably going to end in less than 2 weeks (maybe less than 1) i guess in the grand scheme of things it isnt that big a deal if i do poorly on this test. afterall, who's gonna know? nobody. if you need an explanation of the last comment about the end of humanity you are likely both ill informed and naive. as you should know we have set a deadline of next monday, i believe, for saddam to disarm and distroy his weapons. because saddam will never do this we will piss the entire world off and invade iraq. if you think about it, he really cant do it. if he dissarms to our satisfaction then we know he doesnt have shit, and we will take his ass out anyway, so what difference does it make to him. a desperate man with nothing to lose, is a dangerous man, especially if he is as powerful as saddam. if it isnt saddam who attacks us maybe it will be turkey or north korea or one of the other hundreds of countries who hate bush and the US and then inevitably the nukes will fly and all will be destroyed. atleast i dont live in a major city along the eastern seaboard. suckers. oh shit, i DO live in a major city along the eastern seaboard. well, just know that when those nukes are on their way you gotta know that ill be looting the shit out of boston.

on todays special entry in mattio's lounge we will examine some of the more comical conspiracy theories and what not i found while wasting time aimlessly traversing the information superhighway. first, "Mario is a Communist". i especially liked the link at the bottom of the page entitled "A Case of Communism: The Super Mario Story". next is a pseudo religious theory written by the same people you brought you the ladder theory. it is called My "God is Asleep" Theory, or "Even if there is a God we're fucked anyway". the final item of interest that i found is not really a theory. in fact it isnt anything close to a theory. it is a McDonalds employee simulator, kind of a choose your own lame adventure. while initially intriguing it grows real old real quick.